How do I?

How do I explain the rapid beating of my heart? Continue reading


Fading away slowly

My love has lost his love

He walks around with his head bowed

Even though he smiles sometimes

His cheeks don’t crinkle

His laugh no longer tinkles

His teeth don’t show

He’s being polite or putting up a show


My love has lost his love

I can’t tell why, where or how

He pats my hand when he sees I worry

He says he loves me but

It feels like a story

And even worse

He keeps saying I’m sorry


My love has lost his love

He doesn’t want to touch

He flinches when you’re too close

He sleeps on the edge

He gnashes his teeth at night

He curls and twists

But his movements used to be light


My love has lost his love

That thing that made him come alive

That way he’d talk for hours on end

Now it’s just time he spends

Nothing to look forward to

Motions and movement playing his part

Always faithful to his duty

Oh how I miss you my friend.

He just….

He didn’t say I couldn’t write,

He just

Frowned every time he read my poems

He just

Asked me to tone it down,

He just

Told me to consider what people would think,

He just

Listened to them tell him it was about him,

He just

Made me feel guilty for having a gift,

He just

Creeped into my head and planted seeds of shame,

Watered the insecurity and passed the blame,

He just

Failed to see that this was about me,

A way to speak words that swam in my head,

chocked in my throat and tortured my heart

He just

Was not having it

So what’s a girl to do

But give up her pen and paper for love

He just, left

So I, bereft

Picked up where I left